GROW Model: How Managers Run It, With Questions and Examples

The GROW model is a four-stage way to structure a coaching conversation: Goal, Reality, Options, and Will (or Way Forward). The manager asks questions at each stage so the other person sets the goal, describes where things stand, generates choices, and commits to a next step. It's one of the most widely used coaching frameworks in management, and it fits comfortably inside a 30-minute 1:1.

Here's the problem it solves. Odalys, who runs customer support at a 60-person software company, spent most of a quarter telling one of her best agents, Tobias, what to do about his stalled plan to move into team leadership. She gave him reading lists, an intro to another team lead, and a stretch project. Nothing moved. When she finally asked him what he actually wanted, the answer was a surprise: he didn't want to manage people at all. He wanted to own the training program. Three months of advice had been aimed at the wrong target.

This guide shows how to run the GROW model so you find the real goal first. You'll get a worked dialogue for each stage, a bank of coaching questions you can copy, a 30-minute timing plan, the mistakes that derail most managers, and a clear view of when GROW is the wrong tool. If you're also weighing it against other options, our overview of feedback models puts it next to eleven others.

What the GROW model is

GROW is a question-led structure for helping someone move from a vague wish to a committed action. It was developed in the 1980s and is usually credited to Graham Alexander, Alan Fine, and Sir John Whitmore, with Whitmore's book Coaching for Performance spreading it widely. You can find a short history on Wikipedia's GROW model entry.

The idea behind it is simple. People are more likely to follow through on a plan they built themselves than one they were handed. So instead of diagnosing and prescribing, you ask the questions that let them do both.

Some versions add a "Topic" step before Goal, and some call the last letter "Way forward". The shape is the same. If you want a guided reference for the 1:1 around it, our one-on-one meeting template has a monthly career conversation that pairs well with GROW.

The running example

To keep this practical, we'll follow one conversation through all four stages. Dariusz is a team lead at a 40-person logistics company. Amara, one of his planners, has been saying for a month that she wants to "get better at presenting." She has a quarterly review in six weeks, and Dariusz has 30 minutes in their weekly 1:1.

Stage 1: Goal

The Goal stage turns a topic ("presenting") into an outcome ("run the Q1 planning review without notes in front of the ops directors"). Skip this and everything after it floats. A goal is ready when you can both picture it happening and say how you'd know it had.

Goal stage in action

Dariusz: You've mentioned presenting a few times. What would you like to be different?

Amara: I just want to be better at it. More confident, I guess.

Dariusz: Confident in which situation? Picture the one that matters most in the next few months.

Amara: The quarterly planning review. I present to the ops directors and I read from the slides the whole time.

Dariusz: So what would a good version look like?

Amara: Talking through the plan without looking at my notes for more than a glance. And answering questions without freezing.

Dariusz: And how will you know it went well?

Amara: If someone asks a question mid-way and I can answer it without losing my place.

Notice the manager never says what a good presentation is. He asks, and the goal gets narrower each time.

Goal questions to copy

• What would you like to achieve from this conversation?
• What does success look like, specifically?
• How will you know you've got there?
• Is this goal within your control, or does it depend on someone else?
• By when would you like to have made progress?
• On a scale of one to ten, how much do you want this? What would make it a ten?
• If this went perfectly, what would be different in three months?

Stage 2: Reality

Reality is the stage managers rush, and it's where most coaching conversations go wrong. The point is to get an honest, specific picture of the present: what's happening, what's been tried, and what's in the way. Facts first, then feelings, then your own observations only if they're asked for.

Reality stage in action

Dariusz: Where are you now with that, compared with the picture you just described?

Amara: Probably a four out of ten. I'm fine one-to-one, but in front of the directors I speed up and lose my place.

Dariusz: What have you tried so far?

Amara: I rehearse the night before, but I rehearse the slides, so I basically memorize what to read out.

Dariusz: What gets in the way?

Amara: Honestly, I don't know the numbers well enough. If someone asks about the Leeds depot, I can't recall the figures without the slide.

Dariusz: So the issue might be less about delivery and more about how well you know the material?

Amara: Huh. Yes, that's probably it.

That's the payoff. The problem she walked in with ("confidence") wasn't the real one. If Dariusz had skipped to advice, he might have booked her onto a presentation skills course.

The wrong turn

Here's what that exchange looks like when it goes wrong.

Amara: I speed up and lose my place.

Dariusz: Right, you need to slow down. Take a breath between slides and use a clicker. Maybe I'll send you a link to a good course.

That's advice, delivered in the Reality stage, before the real obstacle surfaced. Amara nods, nothing changes, and the 1:1 ends with a task nobody believes in. If you catch yourself doing this, say so and back up: "Sorry, I jumped ahead. Tell me more about what happens when you lose your place."

Reality questions to copy

• What's happening now? Describe it as if I were watching.
• What have you tried so far, and what happened?
• What's getting in the way, inside you and outside you?
• Who else is affected or involved?
• What's your own part in this?
• What do you already know about how to solve this?
• On a scale of one to ten, where are you now?

Stage 3: Options

Options is where you widen the field before narrowing it. Aim for at least three choices, and push past the first obvious ones. The best idea is often the fourth or fifth. Your role is to keep asking "what else?" and to hold back your own suggestions until the person has run dry.

Options stage in action

Dariusz: If you knew you couldn't fail, what would you do about the numbers problem?

Amara: I'd probably build a one-page cheat sheet of the key figures per depot and learn it properly.

Dariusz: What else?

Amara: I could present a section of the planning review as a smaller trial first. Maybe the weekly ops stand-up.

Dariusz: What else?

Amara: I could ask Ngozi how she prepares. She never uses slides.

Dariusz: Anything you'd do if you had no limits on time or budget?

Amara: Run the whole review as a conversation instead of a presentation, with a single chart on screen.

Dariusz: Would you like a suggestion from me, or are you set?

Amara: Go on.

Dariusz: You could ask a colleague to throw random questions at you during a rehearsal.

Two things to copy. First, "what else?" does the heavy lifting. Second, Dariusz asks permission before offering his own idea, and he offers only one, after Amara has finished.

Options questions to copy

• What could you do? What else?
• What would you do if you had no constraints?
• What would you do if you had to give this advice to a friend?
• Who has solved something like this before, and what could you learn from them?
• What's the smallest step you could take this week?
• What are the pros and cons of each option?
• Would you like to hear an idea from me?

Stage 4: Will

Will converts a choice into a commitment. A good commitment has an action, a date, and a way of checking in. It also includes a quick look at what could derail it, because the plan that survives contact with next Tuesday is the one that anticipated next Tuesday.

Will stage in action

Dariusz: Which of those are you going to do?

Amara: The cheat sheet, and the rehearsal with the questions. I'll ask Ngozi as well.

Dariusz: When will you start?

Amara: I'll draft the cheat sheet by Friday. I'll book the rehearsal for the week before the review.

Dariusz: What could get in the way?

Amara: The depot figures get updated on Thursday, so I should wait until then.

Dariusz: Good catch. How committed are you, one to ten?

Amara: An eight.

Dariusz: What would make it a nine?

Amara: Putting the rehearsal in your calendar too.

Dariusz: Done. Shall we check in on the cheat sheet next week?

Will questions to copy

• What will you do, and by when?
• How will you know you've done it?
• What might get in the way, and how will you handle it?
• Who else needs to know or help?
• How committed are you, on a scale of one to ten? What would make it higher?
• What support do you want from me?
• When shall we check in on this?

How to run GROW in a 30-minute 1:1

GROW usually lives inside a regular 1:1, not in a separate meeting. You can use it for the whole slot or for the middle 20 minutes after a short check-in. Here's a split that works for most conversations.

A few habits make the difference.

• Let them choose the topic. GROW works best when the person brings the problem. If you pick it, it can feel like an interrogation.
• Summarize before you move on. One sentence, in their words, shows you listened and lets them correct you.
• Write it down together. Put the goal, the chosen options, and the first action in the 1:1 notes before the meeting ends.
• Follow up at the next 1:1. The first item on the next agenda should be the action. This is the step that gets skipped, and without it, GROW turns into a nice conversation.

If your 1:1s are mostly status updates today, the skip-level meeting guide covers a different format worth knowing about, and managers building the habit may want a repeatable structure like Start, Stop, Continue for the regular team-level check.

Common mistakes when using the GROW model

Jumping to Options too early

This is the big one. The Goal and Reality stages feel slow, so managers rush to solutions. But the first problem someone names is often not the real one, as with Amara's confidence. Spend at least half the conversation before Options.

Asking leading questions

"Don't you think you should talk to the client first?" is advice dressed as a question. A real question is one you don't already know the answer to. If you have a strong view, say it openly: "I have an idea, do you want it?"

Talking too much

A rough test is to review the dialogue afterwards. If you spoke for more than a third of it, you were mostly telling. Silence after a question is not a problem to solve. Count to five before you fill it.

Skipping the follow-up

Sergei, a head of operations at a 120-person firm, ran GROW conversations with all six of his managers in one month. They went well. Two months later, he asked what had changed and found that only one manager had acted on their plan. It was the one he had checked in with the following week. The follow-up is not an add-on. It is half the method.

GROW vs CLEAR, OSKAR, and SBI

GROW is one of several structures managers use. Which one you pick depends on whether you're asking or telling, and whether the focus is the future or a specific moment.

A simple rule: if you have something to say about what already happened, use SBI. If the other person has a goal and needs to work out how to reach it, use GROW. CLEAR and OSKAR are reasonable alternatives if you prefer a built-in review step or like the solution-focused scaling approach. Our guide to feedback models compares twelve of them in one table.

When not to use the GROW model

GROW is a good tool for development and problem-solving. It's a poor tool for several other situations.

• Urgent problems. If a customer deadline is tomorrow, you need a decision, not an exploration. Decide, then coach afterwards.
• A clear standard has been missed. If someone has broken a policy or repeatedly missed an agreed expectation, asking "what do you want?" signals you're not taking it seriously. Be direct.
• The person has no experience of the topic. Questions work when people have something to draw on. A new starter learning a process needs to be shown, not asked.
• You already have the answer. If the decision is made, don't run a coaching conversation to make the person feel they chose it. They'll notice.

When coaching hasn't changed the behavior

Sometimes you've run GROW, the person agreed a plan, and the same behavior comes back. Coaching assumes the person wants to change and lacks only the route. When that assumption fails, the next step is accountability, not another coaching round.

The Accountability Dial is the escalation path. It runs from a mention, to an invitation, to a conversation, to a boundary, and finally a limit, and it's designed for repeated behavior rather than single events. The dial comes from Jonathan Raymond's book Good Authority. Our employee accountability guide explains each step. If you're preparing for the harder end of that range, see our walkthrough of difficult performance conversations.

A practical sequence for a repeated issue looks like this: name the specific moment with SBI, coach toward a plan with GROW, and if the pattern returns after the agreed plan, move up the Dial. Each tool has a different job.

Using team-level data with GROW

GROW works at the level of one person. It can't tell you whether a theme is an individual problem or a team-wide one, and coaching three people separately won't fix a system issue. A short recurring pulse survey is one way to spot those patterns before you go into the 1:1. If a question about clarity or recognition is trending down on your team, you can bring that to your GROW conversations as a topic to explore rather than a conclusion to deliver.

Try GROW in your next 1:1

You don't need training to start. Pick one person and one topic they've mentioned recently. Write the four stage names on a notepad, plus two questions for each from the lists above. In the meeting, spend the first half on Goal and Reality, ask "what else?" at least three times in Options, and finish with an action, a date, and a check-in. Write it down and open the next 1:1 with it.

After two or three conversations, review how much you talked and how often the action got done. Those two numbers will tell you more than any scorecard. 1:1s are coming to FeedbackPulse in Q1 2027, so this kind of conversation can eventually sit alongside the team's survey results and reviews.

If you'd rather start by finding out what your team needs from you, FeedbackPulse is free for teams of up to 10 people, and a short pulse survey takes minutes to set up.